Conflicting data

There is not much data on ADT (androgen deprivation therapy. What there is illustrates different response levels dependant on the total picture of the afflicted patient.

For example...disease progression slows in those who are not hormone refractory. At the same time, cardiac issues climb, osteoporosis and diabetes as well. So while mortality from cancer may decrease or longevity increase, the patient dies from cardiac symptoms, hip fractures, or out of control sugar.

Miller's family all have diabetes, except for him. Miller has no elevated cholesterol prior to this treatment. But he has it now. That is being addressed with a statin medication. Increased fractures due to osteoporosis have been shown is studies. That can be (but so far has not been) dealt with using boniva or other medications that encourage bone development.

Thus opting for one treatment over the other as best...can be problematic

Preparing for yet another doctor

We have decided that Mr. Miller needs an oncologist closer than New Haven. We have also decided to try Hartford Hospital Harry Grey Cancer center. So on Sept. 17 we go there for a visit with Dr. Siegal there. We are hoping to find him receptive to the intermittent therapy versus the continual therapy that his urologist suggests.

The FELON urologist. (Sorry I can't get past the fact that he is a felon.) Personally, if I never saw him again I would be very happy. At any rate more positive thoughts are needed about Miller's treatment. I am hoping that Doctor Siegal is aware of clinical trials that may be helpful.

Also today I will drive to Newington to the VA to see whether they have all the records they asked for in anticipation of Miller's appt there on Sept 3 for a genitourinary exam. This will help decide whether he will be granted a disability due to exposure to agent orange in Viet Nam. Miller also has glaucoma. This is another condition that results from agent orange exposure. We are claiming on both issues.

Hormone Deprivation Therapy

Well one thing good can be said...it works. Miller's PSA is 0.1 after only one shot.

However, Most of the new school on this treatment says it should be intermittent...stopped when the PSA is low enough (which it is) and restarted when it rises again to 20 or so ng/dl. Miller's current doctor wants to keep him on the therapy. However his cholesterol has risen to 273 from normal and his sugar is elevated as well. There is diabetes in his family. The possibility of heart attack and/or stroke is much increased. Osteoporosis increases, muscle wasting increases, ad infinitum for side effects - and serious ones at that. Not to mention ED, gynecomasty, teeth falling out due to bone loss etc etc.etc.

Miller's doctor, a felon, YES a FELON, who was convicted of overusing this drug and scamming patients and insurance companies, has shown absolutely no concern about any of these side effects..that they might kill him.

I firmly believe he wants us to keep going there so he can admisinster the shot and collect a fee for that service, not giving a hoot about what it does to the patient over time. All these effects are just a month after receiving his first injection. What quality of life is there for patients who live on this drug?

I have a hard time being civil to this man. Be that as it may, I made an appointment with a medical oncologist at Harry Gray cancer center here in Hartford. I dont feel he needs to drive all the way to yale new haven for oncology.


Miller is happy happy with the PSA news and doesn't seem to comprehend the necessity of treating the "whole" individual. i.e. Trips to the gym, watching sugar intake, lowering cholesterol intake, monitoring blood pressure etc, etc, etc.

And as he is an easy going sort he hates to leave his FELON friend, but I say good riddance. This man does not use due dilligence. If he had he would have treated this condition BEFORE it spread instead of waiting 4 months to treat him .

Essaic tea

When there is nothing traditional medicine can do for a patient, they turn to alternative medicine. Such is the case with Mr. Miller and Essaic tea. For those it has helped it is a wonder. For those it has not, its a farce.

I am hoping for the former. Today I received the news that a very dear friend of mine's older sister (60) has a similar condition which has metatastized to the bone. She also will be treated with hormone deprivation. For lack of appropriate terminology, she has the female version of what Miller has. The sisters are devastated. Their mother is devastated, and all I can do is be there. The most difficult part about a diagnosis of cancer is the realization there is nothing we can do to change the situation.

Acceptance

I was angry. Now I have achieved acceptance. I no longer fear being without Miller. I will just do one day at a time. All those meetings did not fall on deaf ears. I feel so lousy, my hips my shoulders, my breathing, my fatigue, totally consumed by my arthritis...or whatever is doing it...that it eases my sense of loss... cause I feel I wont be far behind. Or at least I hope that is the case. I guess that is a good thing. Why should I be angry? we all begin dying on the day we are born"

Nice to get away

It was so beautiful in upstate New York, Saratoga, the weather was perfect the track was crowded, yet there was enough room for all. It was nice because we actually were able (as far as I can tell) to forget the "C" word for most of the day. We had fun. We each won some money so that made it more fun. Fun is an elixir that knows no bounds. Friday was a wonderful night and Saturday a wonderful day too. The room was excellent at the Fairmont, with a 42 inch flat screen TV. It was almost like being at home.

On Saturday evening though, in lake George, it was quite a different story. The cabin we stayed in would take two full pages of description, were it a big part of the story. Suffice it to say, among many other inconveniences, the bed was rock hard, and I got no sleep the whole night. This left me limp for the drive home on Sunday, when I had to ask Miller to take the wheel after only an hour or so. Thankfully he is well enough, and did not mind at all..or didnt show it if he did. We stopped in flea markets on the way back, but I was too beat to enjoy them.

We took home brewed green tea with us, and ate healthfully, except for the pizza on Sunday afternoon. Miller had taken his first dose of Essaic Tea on Friday before we left. He had none on Saturday or Sunday, but will begin with renew on Monday.

I went to bed at 8 hardly able to keep my eyes open. Miller didnt retire til midnight. I think he has more energy than I do. He did have another healing with Naomi last Sunday and I think this helps him a lot, if not physically, than mentally.

A Break

It's amazing how much time worrying can consume. It's also amazing how much strength is zapped with that self-same worrying. Today I took a break and had lunch with a dear friend. Just talking about other things lifts the burden that the word "cancer" places into one's heart. The two hours we spent at lunch brought me refreshment I had not envisioned.

Today I am reading a newsletter from the main stream medical authorities. Earlier I looked up alternative medicine treatments for PC. One very interesting article talked about Immuneo-Augmentive Therapy (IAT.) This is a process that stimulates one's own immune system to better recognize cancer cells and destroy them. It costs about $8500 for the initial treatment, and lesser amounts for follow-up. It takes 2-3 weeks and is performed in the Bahamas.

Today also I recieved the homeopathic tea from the organization founded by Rene Caisse, a Canadian nurse who has helped hundreds of cancer patients.

It is called Essiac, given its name by ("caisse" spelt backwards), consists of four main herbs that grow in the wilderness of Ontario, Canada. The original formula is believed to have its roots from the native Canadian Ojibway Indians.

The four main herbs that make up Essiac are Burdock Root, Slippery Elm Inner Bark, Sheep Sorrel and Indian Rhubarb Root. The tea is made in small batches and consumed hot in quantities of no more than 4 oz per day. This tea is said also to stimulate immune function. We will begin the dosage tonite. Poor Mr. Miller, has no idea what is in store for him, but he obediently trys anything I give him.

Suggestions from the Caisse website:

To help rebuild the human immune system's strength and resistance, consider the following suggestions:

In addition to the tea one should
-Avoid exhaustion, stress and fatigue.
-Practice relaxation techniques such as meditation, yoga, or tai chi.
-Add to your daily nutrition plenty of fresh fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds and a variety of grains. These will add essential nutrients to your body, which are important for growth, repair and daily well being.
-Have your essential trace minerals tested by your healthcare professional. These are vital to maintaining a balanced and healthy immune system.
-Drink 6 glasses of bottled, spring or filtered water daily to help purge toxins and waste from the body.
-Sleep a minimum of 6 hours daily.
-Eliminate hydrogenated fats, processed foods, food additives, preservatives, artificial color and flavor.
-Walk, swim or cycle a minimum of 15 minutes each day.
-Take a multi-vitamin and multi-mineral supplement daily.



So far he is drinking green tea, consuming fish oil and eating lots of red grapes and strawberries while cutting down fat to as great an extent as possible. He seems to like it and does not complain about the quart of green tea I brew for him every day. Hopefully the Essaic will not be foul tasting and turn him off.

In 2 weeks he will have his PSA checked, and we will know at that time whether his cancer is hormone refractory or hormone dependent. We pray that it is the latter.

Medicine from Hong Kong

I got a call yesterday from a fellow in Hong Kong named Larry Pope. He sells a PC protocol that he claims "tricks the brain" into thinking there is no estrogen present.

Traditional medicine does an androgen blockade against testosterone, not estrogen. The guy sounded like a wing-nut, for sure. He kept talking about traditional treatment as a "dog and pony show." In fact he sounded most like these television preachers who "hallaleuja" away your money. Same Southern accent, same fast talking. His protocol is $425.00. He sent me an email written in ALL CAPITALS. IS THIS NOT THE MOST ANNOYING FONT TO READ? AND THERE WERE NO PARAGRAPHS EITHER.

However, he did cause me to look up estrogen and PC and there may be some merit to what he is professing. He said he had to leave the country because of the FDA. So I assume his treatment is verboten in the states or at least the drugs (herbs) are.

I am keeping an open mind. Will investigate further.

On illness and dying

My precious man has a terminal illness: prostate cancer which has advanced to the lymph nodes. He is well othrwise and works every day. He remains cheerful where I could never. He may feel hopeful, but I feel hopeless.

We all die sometime, and I well may go before him, but if so, I have the comfort of not knowing it is imminent. He doesn't. This is the most upsetting part, at least for me.

The diagnosis of PC was made more than a year ago. However, the treatment took four months to initiate, in which time the cancer spread out of the prostate. For this wait, I am angry. Angry with the doctors, angry with myself for not insisting treatment begin sooner, and angry with my God.

Glynn chose Brachytherapy. Implantation of radioactive seeds into the prostate. The dosage is focused and does little harm to surrounding tissues. (At the same time it does little harm to cancer which has spread out of the capsule.)

So thats where we stand, and its from this perspective that I share my thoughts on living with dying.